I am someone who cherishes memories deeply. In many ways I am sentimental beyond what is healthy or helpful and while precious memories are a blessing, sad memories can stir pain in my soul that can be overwhelming.
Recently I brought this aspect of my way of being before God and simply asked for help.
God’s response has been incredibly life-giving and allowed me a freedom to experience remembering that I haven’t experienced for 19 years (since mum died).
God (in the persona of Father) simply said,
“I hold ALL memories in my Love”
In that moment I encountered a profound awareness of the way that God is so fully outside of Time and Space, that what manifests in my consciousness as a “memory” (a recollection or reminder of a past event, feeling, experience or thing) is held not only by the Hands of God but is enveloped in the fullness of Shalom – the glorious, healing Presence.
In my imagination I have since been able to take each memory (mostly the ones that bring pain but not only those ones) as they arise and hold them out to God and “see” Him holding them in His hands, surrounding them in a bubble of His glory (Shekinah).
As this happens and Divine Love holds the memory with such care and compassion, the pain fades away and I find myself free to release the memory into its rightful place in the past.
I later asked Spirit to give me a secondary foundation for this new practice.
I was reminded of an ancient truth.
“You have surrounded me on every side, behind (the past) me and before (the future) me” Ps 139:5
Not all memories will require this practice to be released but I am thankful that for the ones that do, I have been given the deep wisdom on how to.
Ps 139 The Voice
O Eternal One, You have explored my heart and know exactly who I am;
2 You even know the small details like when I take a seat and when I stand up again.
Even when I am far away, You know what I’m thinking.
3 You observe my wanderings and my sleeping, my waking and my dreaming,
and You know everything I do in more detail than even I know.
4 You know what I’m going to say long before I say it.
It is true, Eternal One, that You know everything and everyone.
5 You have surrounded me on every side, behind me and before me,
and You have placed Your hand gently on my shoulder.
6 It is the most amazing feeling to know how deeply You know me, inside and out;
the realization of it is so great that I cannot comprehend it.
7 Can I go anywhere apart from Your Spirit?
Is there anywhere I can go to escape Your watchful presence?
8 If I go up into heaven, You are there.
If I make my bed in the realm of the dead, You are there.
9 If I ride on the wings of morning,
if I make my home in the most isolated part of the ocean,
10 Even then You will be there to guide me;
Your right hand will embrace me, for You are always there.
11 Even if I am afraid and think to myself, “There is no doubt that the darkness will swallow me,
the light around me will soon be turned to night,”
12 You can see in the dark, for it is not dark to Your eyes.
For You the night is just as bright as the day.
Darkness and light are the same to Your eyes.
13 For You shaped me, inside and out.
You knitted me together in my mother’s womb long before I took my first breath.
14 I will offer You my grateful heart, for I am Your unique creation, filled with wonder and awe.
You have approached even the smallest details with excellence;
Your works are wonderful;
I carry this knowledge deep within my soul.
15 You see all things; nothing about me was hidden from You
As I took shape in secret,
carefully crafted in the heart of the earth before I was born from its womb.
16 You see all things;
You saw me growing, changing in my mother’s womb;
Every detail of my life was already written in Your book;
You established the length of my life before I ever tasted the sweetness of it.
17 Your thoughts and plans are treasures to me, O God! I cherish each and every one of them!
How grand in scope! How many in number!
18 If I could count each one of them, they would be more than all the grains of sand on earth. Their number is inconceivable!
Even when I wake up, I am still near to You.
19 I wish You would destroy all the wicked, O God.
So keep away from me, those who are thirsty for blood!
20 For they say such horrible things about You,
and those who are against You abuse Your good name.
21 Is it not true that I hate all who hate You, Eternal One?
Is it not true that I despise all who come against You?
22 Deep hatred boils within me toward them;
I am Your friend, and they are my enemies.
23 Explore me, O God, and know the real me. Dig deeply and discover who I am.
Put me to the test and watch how I handle the strain.
24 Examine me to see if there is an evil bone in me,
and guide me down Your path forever.